R. dangerfield one liner - The 1947 - Present Chevrolet & GMC Truck Message Board Network

blazer2007 · 01-22-2019, 10:58 AM

I watched a documentary on Rodney and had to laugh more on this one. Hey Doc,what is the difference in a oral and a rectal thermometer , Doc says the taste.

**The Rocknrod** · 01-22-2019, 11:40 AM

He is Awesome!
I called suicide prevention, they put me on hold.
Caddy Shack was great - Is this your grand-son? Now I know why tigers eat their young.

67ChevyRedneck · 01-22-2019, 12:00 PM

I was thinking that was used in Caddy Shack.

Another one he said that's always stuck with me:

It's a two-story house! You wanna know why they call it a two-story? Because you get one story before they sell it to you and another story after you've bought it!

68Gold/white · 01-22-2019, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blazer2007

I watched a documentary on Rodney and had to laugh more on this one. Hey Doc,what is the difference in a oral and a rectal thermometer , Doc says the taste.

That one is old, at least to me. If you want to break the ice at a party with dainty special women attending, tell it to them, their noses will definitely wrinkle up!!!

**LockDoc** · 01-22-2019, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 68Gold/white

That one is old, at least to me. If you want to break the ice at a party with dainty special women attending, tell it to them, their noses will definitely wrinkle up!!!

At this point in time all of his one liners are old....

LockDoc

67ChevyRedneck · 01-22-2019, 03:14 PM

Yea, he passed away almost 15 years ago. I remember him the most from "LadyBugs" and Caddyshack.

**The Rocknrod** · 01-22-2019, 03:37 PM

He had a wonderful childhood. Not.

**leddzepp** · 01-22-2019, 04:14 PM

Whoa! Did somebody step on a duck!?

68Gold/white · 01-22-2019, 04:29 PM

My wife was such a bad cook, the fly's were on the INSIDE of the screen door, begging for someone to open the door so they could get out, and not have to smell the slop she was cook'n...

**Stocker** · 01-22-2019, 04:40 PM

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.

Indian113 · 01-22-2019, 06:11 PM

The secret to a long marriage is a two week vacation every year. She takes hers in June and I take mine in July!

100%Chevy · 01-22-2019, 08:20 PM

Quoted on his headstone---

"There Goes The Neighborhood"!

Mike.

**truckster** · 01-22-2019, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 68Gold/white

That one is old, at least to me. If you want to break the ice at a party with dainty special women attending, tell it to them, their noses will definitely wrinkle up!!!

I wonder how many of the younger folks even know what a rectal thermometer is.

**Stocker** · 01-22-2019, 09:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by truckster

I wonder how many of the younger folks even know what a rectal thermometer is.

It is an infant's training device to prepare them for prostate exams in their later years.

**FleetsidePaul** · 01-23-2019, 06:44 AM

He was funny until the end.

The last comments I heard from him were when he was going in for his surgery and they asked him how long he would be in the hospital.

He said " Well if everything goes okay 10 days. If not I'll be out sooner'

**special-K** · 01-23-2019, 08:13 AM

He could sure go on with the "No respect" thing. Some of his best! (and I could relate)

pritch · 01-24-2019, 11:51 PM

We went to see Rodney on stage once, and it was a blast! He was one of the greats for sure.

One of my favorite lines was when his wife cut him back to once a month
"But I was lucky-I know two guys she cut off altogether!"

**G&R's57GMC** · 01-25-2019, 02:09 AM

One of his was : Take my wife ....Please !

I can’t get no respect

Ahh the good old days , these young ones missed a lot of great stuff .

**62bagger** · 01-25-2019, 02:29 AM

How about;
The only picture I want to see of my mother inlaw is a chalk outline of her on the sidewalk.

68Gold/white · 01-26-2019, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by G&R's57GMC

One of his was : Take my wife ....Please !

I can’t get no respect

Ahh the good old days , these young ones missed a lot of great stuff .

LOL, I didn't understand that joke.......until I got married

**Stocker** · 01-26-2019, 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by G&R's57GMC

One of his was : Take my wife ....Please !

One of the all-time classics..... but wasn't it Henny Youngman who said it?
Hard to say for sure, some of those guys weren't shy about stealing each other's material.

**FleetsidePaul** · 01-28-2019, 03:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stocker

One of the all-time classics..... but wasn't it Henny Youngman who said it?
Hard to say for sure, some of those guys weren't shy about stealing each other's material.

Yup. Henny Youngman. I don't know about the old days but stealing jokes today is a big no no. If you can't write your own jokes, then don't go on stage.

outfield · 01-28-2019, 03:51 PM

I loved watching him on Johnny Carson...

"My wife's so ugly, when you look up ugly in the dictionary, it's her picture".

I was laughing so hard one night watching him on Johnny, I woke up the wife! She was pissed.

**Ol Blue K20** · 01-28-2019, 05:52 PM

What's a dictionary? Lol

**leddzepp** · 01-28-2019, 06:58 PM

His best (funniest) movie in my opinion was Easy Money, and it is often overlooked. I wish he had a bigger role in Caddyshack. Back to School is another favorite of mine.

01-22-2019, 10:58 AM	#1
blazer2007 Registered User Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: vernon b.c. Posts: 3,022	R. dangerfield one liner I watched a documentary on Rodney and had to laugh more on this one. Hey Doc,what is the difference in a oral and a rectal thermometer , Doc says the taste.

01-22-2019, 11:40 AM	#2
The Rocknrod Moderator Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: China Spring, TX Posts: 7,280	Re: R. dangerfield one liner He is Awesome! I called suicide prevention, they put me on hold. Caddy Shack was great - Is this your grand-son? Now I know why tigers eat their young. __________________ Master Chief, US Navy, Retired 1964 C10 Step-side Short Bed - In Progress 2009 2500HD Duramax LTZ 1948 GMC Panel 1956 Big Window Stepside 1953 5 Window Chevy Stepside 1932 Coupe New Seat Foam for Bench Seats?

01-22-2019, 12:00 PM	#3
67ChevyRedneck Hittin E-Z Street on Mud Tires Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Greenville, SC Posts: 23,090	Re: R. dangerfield one liner I was thinking that was used in Caddy Shack. Another one he said that's always stuck with me: It's a two-story house! You wanna know why they call it a two-story? Because you get one story before they sell it to you and another story after you've bought it! __________________ Jesse James 1967 C10 SWB Stepside: 350/700R4/3.73 1965 Ford Mustang: 289/T5-5spd/3.25 Trac-Loc 1968 Pontiac Firebird: Project Fire Chicken! 2015 Silverado Double Cab 5.3L Z71 2001 Jeep Wrangler Sport 4.0L 5spd 2020 Chevrolet Equinox Premium 2.0L Turbo 2011 Mustang V6 ~ Wife's ride American Born, Country by the Grace of God 1967 CST Shop Truck Rebuild! My 1967 C-10 Build Thread My Vintage Air A/C Install Project "On a Dime" Trying my hand at Home Renovation! 1965 Mustang Modifications!

01-22-2019, 03:14 PM	#6
67ChevyRedneck Hittin E-Z Street on Mud Tires Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Greenville, SC Posts: 23,090	Re: R. dangerfield one liner Yea, he passed away almost 15 years ago. I remember him the most from "LadyBugs" and Caddyshack. __________________ Jesse James 1967 C10 SWB Stepside: 350/700R4/3.73 1965 Ford Mustang: 289/T5-5spd/3.25 Trac-Loc 1968 Pontiac Firebird: Project Fire Chicken! 2015 Silverado Double Cab 5.3L Z71 2001 Jeep Wrangler Sport 4.0L 5spd 2020 Chevrolet Equinox Premium 2.0L Turbo 2011 Mustang V6 ~ Wife's ride American Born, Country by the Grace of God 1967 CST Shop Truck Rebuild! My 1967 C-10 Build Thread My Vintage Air A/C Install Project "On a Dime" Trying my hand at Home Renovation! 1965 Mustang Modifications!

01-22-2019, 03:37 PM	#7
The Rocknrod Moderator Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: China Spring, TX Posts: 7,280	Re: R. dangerfield one liner He had a wonderful childhood. Not. __________________ Master Chief, US Navy, Retired 1964 C10 Step-side Short Bed - In Progress 2009 2500HD Duramax LTZ 1948 GMC Panel 1956 Big Window Stepside 1953 5 Window Chevy Stepside 1932 Coupe New Seat Foam for Bench Seats?

01-22-2019, 04:14 PM	#8
leddzepp Moderator Join Date: May 2007 Location: Southern Cal Posts: 19,978	Re: R. dangerfield one liner Whoa! Did somebody step on a duck!? __________________ 1972 C/10 Cheyenne Super SWB. Restored, loaded, slammed. 1968 C/10 50th Anniversary LWB. Unrestored, stock, daily driver/work truck. RIP ElJay RIP 67ChevyRedneck RIP Grumpy Old Man

01-22-2019, 04:29 PM	#9
68Gold/white Registered User Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Ark City, Kansas Posts: 3,271	Re: R. dangerfield one liner My wife was such a bad cook, the fly's were on the INSIDE of the screen door, begging for someone to open the door so they could get out, and not have to smell the slop she was cook'n...

01-22-2019, 04:40 PM	#10
Stocker 20' Daredevil (Ret) Join Date: May 2003 Location: Jefferson State Posts: 13,495	Re: R. dangerfield one liner My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. __________________ - Mike - 1972 K20 LWB 350/350/205 RIP El Jay

01-22-2019, 06:11 PM	#11
Indian113 Registered User Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Monroe,Iowa Posts: 4,370	Re: R. dangerfield one liner The secret to a long marriage is a two week vacation every year. She takes hers in June and I take mine in July!

01-22-2019, 08:20 PM	#12
100%Chevy Registered User Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Moss Point,Ms. Posts: 1,439	Re: R. dangerfield one liner Quoted on his headstone--- "There Goes The Neighborhood"! Mike.

01-23-2019, 06:44 AM	#15
FleetsidePaul R.I.P. E.S.L.L. Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA. Posts: 11,411	Re: R. dangerfield one liner He was funny until the end. The last comments I heard from him were when he was going in for his surgery and they asked him how long he would be in the hospital. He said " Well if everything goes okay 10 days. If not I'll be out sooner' __________________ 1971 Custom C/20 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God.

01-23-2019, 08:13 AM	#16
special-K Special Order Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Mt Airy, MD Posts: 85,862	Re: R. dangerfield one liner He could sure go on with the "No respect" thing. Some of his best! (and I could relate) __________________ "BUILDING A BETTER WAY TO SERVE THE USA"......67/72......"The New Breed" GMC '67 C1500 Wideside Super Custom SWB: 327/M22/3.42 posi.........."The '67" (project) GMC '72 K2500 Wideside Sierra Custom Camper: 350/TH350/4.10 Power-Lok..."The '72" (rolling) Tim "Don't call me a redneck. I'm a rough cut country gentleman" R.I.P. ~ East Side Low Life ~ El Jay ~ 72BLUZ ~ Fasteddie69 ~ Ron586 ~ 67ChevyRedneck ~ Grumpy Old Man ~

01-24-2019, 11:51 PM	#17
pritch Registered User Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Hoytsville, Utah Posts: 3,365	Re: R. dangerfield one liner We went to see Rodney on stage once, and it was a blast! He was one of the greats for sure. One of my favorite lines was when his wife cut him back to once a month "But I was lucky-I know two guys she cut off altogether!" __________________ '68 Panel Project Boogie Chillin' '68 C-10 Ol' Green

01-25-2019, 02:09 AM	#18
G&R's57GMC Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Shasta Lake, CA. Posts: 1,619	Re: R. dangerfield one liner One of his was : Take my wife ....Please ! I can’t get no respect Ahh the good old days , these young ones missed a lot of great stuff . __________________ Glen & Jane's Rides ‘57 GMC NAPCO Long Bed V8 4 speed Bought 2008 7 other cars & trucks , 5 trailers '56 Chevy Long Bed I6, 4 speed Bought 1990 Sold 8.22.2020 ’56 GMC Suburban Pickup V8, 4 speed Hydramatic Bought 1996 Sold 10.11.2020 My Other Tinkerings http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...75#post8967275

01-25-2019, 02:29 AM	#19
62bagger Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2016 Location: Sonora California Posts: 264	Re: R. dangerfield one liner How about; The only picture I want to see of my mother inlaw is a chalk outline of her on the sidewalk.



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01-28-2019, 03:51 PM	#23
outfield Registered User Join Date: Apr 2016 Location: Portland, Or Posts: 387	Re: R. dangerfield one liner I loved watching him on Johnny Carson... "My wife's so ugly, when you look up ugly in the dictionary, it's her picture". I was laughing so hard one night watching him on Johnny, I woke up the wife! She was pissed. Last edited by outfield; 01-28-2019 at 04:03 PM.

01-28-2019, 05:52 PM	#24
Ol Blue K20 Proprietor of Dale's Corner Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Vacaville , CA Posts: 15,834	Re: R. dangerfield one liner What's a dictionary? Lol __________________ "Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man

01-28-2019, 06:58 PM	#25
leddzepp Moderator Join Date: May 2007 Location: Southern Cal Posts: 19,978	Re: R. dangerfield one liner His best (funniest) movie in my opinion was Easy Money, and it is often overlooked. I wish he had a bigger role in Caddyshack. Back to School is another favorite of mine. __________________ 1972 C/10 Cheyenne Super SWB. Restored, loaded, slammed. 1968 C/10 50th Anniversary LWB. Unrestored, stock, daily driver/work truck. RIP ElJay RIP 67ChevyRedneck RIP Grumpy Old Man

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