IRS audit

[richard2717]

At the end of the tax year, the IRS office sent an
inspector to audit the books of a local hospital.

While the IRS agent was checking the books, he turned to
the CFO of the hospital and said, "I notice you buy alot of
bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when
there's too little left to be of any use?"

“Good question” noted the CFO. "We save them up and send
them back to the bandage company and every once in a while,
they send us a free roll."

“Oh”, replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his
unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went,
in his arrogant and obnoxious way. "What do you do with
what's left over after setting a cast on a patient?"

“Ah, yes”, replied the CFO, realizing that the auditor was
trying to trap him with an unanswerable question.
"We save it and send it back to the manufacturer and
every so often they will send us a free bag of plaster."


“I see”, replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he
could fluster the know-it-all CFO. “Well, he went on, "What do
you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?"

"Here, too, we do not waste", answered the CFO. "What we do is
save all the little foreskins and send them to the IRS office, and
about once a year they send us a complete pri**."

[Stocker]

[flashed]

Lol.

[Killer Bee]

LoL good one, now which one of us is gonna get audited for laughing at that

[jeffahart]

Originally Posted by Killer Bee

LoL good one, now which one of us is gonna get audited for laughing at that

Well, Stocker has "Jefferson State" as his location, so he probably gets audited every year anyway. You would think it would be richard2717 for posting and making fun.

But I think with the word killer in your alias, you may in for a meeting with the IRS (Inverted Rectum Society).

Good luck!


j

[richard2717]

We will go with Killer, that sounds better than richard

[Killer Bee]

whoa, whoa, whoa.. let's put away the pitchforks and torches..

besides, I pay enough taxes to support a small village

[richard2717]

[davischevy]

Who's idea was it to bring up taxes anyway.

I was in a good mood.

Sooooooo.......

It takes a village to spend Killers contributions. Hummmm.

[Killer Bee]

LoL, small village, s m a l l village..

but hey, if I had your money, I'd burn mine for heat..

my problem is no write offs, mortgage interest is dwindling, everything else is paid for, and no business ownership

good news, I'm at the short side of my second retirement, farm is paid for and house will be

[Ol Blue K20]

Lol. ...very good

[jeffahart]

And the audit list is growing! Laugh it up!!!


j

[flashed]

They can audit me if they like ,it would be easy for them . I have no debt or deductions so I get hit hard anyway .

[davischevy]

Originally Posted by Killer Bee

LoL, small village, s m a l l village..

but hey, if I had your money, I'd burn mine for heat..

my problem is no write offs, mortgage interest is dwindling, everything else is paid for, and no business ownership

good news, I'm at the short side of my second retirement, farm is paid for and house will be

You mean if I had my money back from the IRS. I am expected to support too many small villages.

If you have a farm, you have deductions. Take advantage of them. A farm is a business.

Congratulations on the lack of debt.

I built houses on the side when I was young, and by the time I was 28 years old we had our house paid for. I rebuilt wrecked cars to drive so I wouldn't have a payment.

I have had some hellacious debt in business at times, but I never had much personal debt. I we couldn't pay for it, we didn't buy it.

[Killer Bee]

family farm been debt free for several years.. only Mom left there now and not sure she'll hold out by herself until I retire..

farm was a decent business when dad was alive but now only maintenance and small leases to neighbors for their cattle and hay cutting..

I'll do my best to fire it up again but with small kids at my age and the timing for the move back, hard to say I'll be in shape for it..

lots and lots of work and still may end up losing so ??

I share your philosophy on spending, we save and use cash almost everywhere.. I have used several zero interest deals but only if I have the money in the bank to pay it off.. keep my money busy and take the free loan

I haven't had a car payment in over 15 years and equity in this orange county house today would build a house or two back home..

and I hear you on the business debt, my folks had gone through the ups/downs farming and raising cattle.. tough business and lots of hard work and heartaches..

might just spend my retirement mowing grass and collecting trucks and guns

and college bills